Never the Right Word

Never the Right Word

Scripts & Templates for Life’s Uncomfortable Conversations.

Contact & find out more.

Legal Information

NTRW is supported by adverts and affiliate marketing links. This means if you click a link or buy a product, we may earn a commission at no extra cost to you. Partnerships help fund this site. For more info, please see our Earnings Disclosure.
This site does not constitute as legal, mental, or medical health advice, please consult a competent licensed professional.

5 Ways to Discuss Sexual Dissatisfaction With Your Partner

There are many difficult conversations people must have with their partners at some point or another, but talking about sex is definitely one of the hardest. Before you start this discussion, it’s important that you enter it wisely, just like you would any tough talk. That means being non-defensive, avoiding the blame game, and using “we” statements so that it doesn’t turn into a fight. Realize that they likely have some things they’re unsatisfied with, too, and make it an open conversation.

1 | Avoid Criticizing

 

No one can handle sexual rejection from their partner. It is extremely painful, and that’s why you should never criticize when talking about sex with your partner. Be careful of your wording to avoid making things sound like they have done something wrong or you are upset with them. Instead, explain how things make you feel and what you prefer. For instance, you might tell them: “I find that being on top of the most pleasurable,” rather than focusing on what you don’t like.

2 | Address Things Directly

 

Many couples have sex less often after they end their “honeymoon” phase, but if you are finding that your partner is initiating sex less and less and it’s bothering you, delicately addressing it is important. Again, using a “we” statement is important. Simply stating: “We haven’t been having sex as often as we used to, and I feel like I’m not as attractive to you as I used to be.”

Finding the reason for the reduced intimacy can be tough, but don’t automatically point fingers about cheating or something else–even if you suspect that. Instead, keep an open mind. Perhaps it’s due to stress as work or even them having their own body image issues, making them think you’re less attracted to them.

Illustrations courtesy of Shutterstock.

This article was originally published on https://nevertherightword.com. If this article appears on any other site other than https://nevertherightword.com without clear referencing it is a violation of the copyright owned by https://nevertherightword.com.

This article may contain affiliate links. That means if you click and buy a product, we may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you. Never the Right Word is a participant in the Awin Affiliates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to participating merchants. For more information, please view our Privacy Policy and disclosure page.

3 | Make Requests Sexy

 

Instead of sweeping your desires under the rug and feeling dissatisfied, which will only lead to resentment, you should work to tell your partner about your desires. Luckily, this doesn’t have to be a stiff or awkward conversation. If you approach it right, you can even make this sexy in itself. For instance, you could say: “I was thinking about what it’d be like if you kissed me like [this] for a long time tonight. Could we try it?”

4 | Seek Input

 

You want your partner to be satisfied, too, so always bring up ways that they could get more satisfaction out of your sex life by asking questions about what they prefer or want to try. Just ask: “What can I do to make things more enjoyable for you?” You can even create sex wishlists and compare them. The point is, figure out what you can do better as you find gentle ways to inform your partner about what they could do better for your pleasure.

5 | Explain Your Likes and Dislikes

 

A great way to keep your sex life fun and enjoyable for both of you is to talk about not only what you do like and don’t like, but also what you might want to try in the future. Have open conversations about things and also be sure to make it clear what you never want to try. You can cross things off and add things to the list as you go along, but the point is that you’re talking about sex like two adults should. In the long run, you’ll grow closer and happier because of it.

Of course, always stick to the main goals, which center around keeping the conversation calm and friendly. You should never take sides or turn things into a fight. It’s something you should work on together, as partners, and not something you should feel up in arms about. With that said, if you have other problems in your relationship–whether it’s general communication issues or emotional abuse–you should consider bringing a professional in to guide your conversation about sex. Doing so can help both of you heal and grow closer in other ways.

At the end of the day, sex is not something you should avoid talking about with your partner. If you feel dissatisfied, it’s likely your partner does too, and if neither of you talks about it, it can lead to major issues down the road–from resentment to infidelity. Be confident that you’ll each find a resolution and find ways to start the conversation today.

At Never the Right Word, our aim is to give you practical examples of how to handle life’s difficult conversations. If you have an awkward situation that you’d like example templates for, request a topic here.   

If you’re interested in further reading, we’ve also included links to our trusted resources and related posts below. To find out more about NTRW and our recommended tools, you can do that here.  

Lastly, if you found this content helpful or want to share your own examples, let us know in the comments. We’d also be delighted if you shared this article and joined us on social media too!

Never the Right Word

Never the Right Word

Hi there! I’m Amy, and I’m the person behind Never the Right Word. I’m a designer-by-day who’s fascinated by human psychology; you’ll find me learning about what makes others tick through all types of media and good old-fashioned conversation.

In 2019 Never the Right Word was born to fill the gap of ‘how-to’ websites with copy and paste examples showing you EXACTLY what you need to say to steer difficult conversations into positive outcomes.

Popular Articles...

Relevant Books We Recommend...

Nonviolent Communication 3rd Ed (Paperback)

In Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life, author Rosenberg presents his strategies for speaking our deepest truths, addressing our needs and emotions, and honoring those same concerns in others. Over the past 35 years, author Marshall Rosenberg has peacefully resolved conflicts in various situations such as families and workplaces across the world in 30 countries. This book outlines his secrets to communicate successfully in professional and personal relationships. Nonviolent Communication teaches the reader the art of observing others without judgment, authentic communication when it comes to our own needs and feelings, and learning to not take negative responses personally. CLICK HERE to get your copy of Nonviolent Communication.

Difficult Conversations

In Difficult Conversations: What to say in tricky situations without ruining the relationship; author Anne Dickson describes a range of difficult conversations that frequently occur in intimate, social, and work situations, and reveals simple but powerful techniques that will help you to transform the scenario. You'll discover how to communicate directly and honestly - without causing friction with those close to you. We love that this book offers 'real-life' examples and links to strategic and high impact negotiations. To get this book from Book Depository please CLICK HERE.

Effective Communication Skills

In Effective Communication Skills: Psychology Guide for Conversation in Marriage by author Daniel Greavestone, each chapter concisely addresses aspects of verbal and nonverbal communication in a way that is easy to understand and has real-world application suggestions. While reading you start to identify common communication mistakes and are equipped with relevant alternative responses. This is an amazing “How To” guide to effectively communicate with anyone by listening with empathy. If you are keen to transform from an awkward communicator into a communication master who is able to enjoy fulfilling personal and professional relationships by mastering skills then CLICK HERE to get your copy of Effective Communication Skills.

Get the Guy

In Get the Guy: Use the Secrets of the Male Mind to Find, Attract and Keep Your Ideal Man by Matthew Hussey- a clear, honest and practical plan of action is presented to teach women on how to go about finding their ideal partner - and, importantly, how to keep him. Using simple steps, Matthew guides us through the complex maze of modern dating and shows us just how to find the guy, get the guy, and keep the guy. Along the way, Matthew deconstructs some commonly held dating myths about what it is that men really want and shares his strategies on how women can take control of their love lives. Buy a copy of Get the Guy by CLICKING HERE.

Pin Never the Right Word on Pinterest!

Like Our Site? These Are the Resources We Recommend.

To build this site we used these highly recommended tried-and-tested tools:

We Trust Elegant Themes

The Elegant Themes membership gives you complete access to 87 amazing themes and 3 awesome plugins, including Divi, the ultimate WordPress Theme and Visual Page builder. Elegant Themes have been building the world's most popular WordPress themes for the past 10 years, and rest assured their products will always be improved and maintained. 

Divi WordPress Theme

We Build With Divi Theme

One of the most popular WordPress themes in the world. Building layouts is easy and fast, making it ideal to create mockups and wireframes, prototyping a design, and creating the website itself. Build from the frontend or backend. The builder is intuitive. It's easy to learn and can be used by non-developers to create amazing websites. Check out the official Divi Theme here.

Divi Cake is a community driven marketplace for Divi Child Themes, Builder Layouts, and Plugins - Shop Now!

We Customize With Divi Cake Plugins

Divi Cake’s main goal is to help the members of the Divi community find the perfect premium Divi themes, layouts, and plugins created by leading Divi developers and designers. Shop hundreds of premium Divi products like Divi child themes, Divi layouts, and Divi plugins on Divi Cake, the community driven Divi Marketplace. Find out more about Divi Cake here.

We ❤️Shutterstock Media

We get our images from the OG leader in stock assets. Boost your business with the right images. They're royalty-free and ready to use. Footage & Music Libraries. 4k Images Added per Hour. No Daily Download Limit. Speedy Search & Discovery. With flexible plans and countless amounts of premium content uploaded weekly, we couldn't leave Shutterstock off our list.

Skill-Up With LinkedIn Learning

When you want to enhance your professional skills with expert-led, online video tutorials, the only place to go is LinkedIn Learning (Lynda). With a subscription you get 24/7, unlimited access to over 13,000 business, design & tech online courses and with a free month. We like them because we get expert-led courses that we can access anytime, anywhere. What's not to love?

Web Hosting

We're Hosted With SiteGround

SiteGround boasts a whole list of fantastic features at amazingly affordable prices. Along with multiple growth options, free site transfers and domains, built in Content Delivery Network integrations, WordPress support AND human support we wouldn't go to anyone else. They're basically faster, safer and more supportive- you can check them out here.

We Trust Grammarly Premium

Even seasoned writers need a helping hand at times, that’s why we trust Grammarly Premium. As the World's Most Accurate Online Grammar Checker, Grammarly Premium goes beyond grammar to help you ensure that everything you write is clear, engaging, and professional. Learn more about Grammarly Premium’s AI-powered assistant here.

Find Graphics With Creative Market

Creative Market is the world’s marketplace for design. Bring your creative projects to life with ready-to-use design assets from independent creators around the world. We love the unique finds, social media templates, vectors you name it they have it. I also doesn't hurt that our founder has a little store on there...

Powered by Creative Market

Powered by Creative Market

Contact Us

Email Us

Never the Right Word
Building 19475
PO Box 6945
London
W1A 6US
United Kingdom

Follow NTRW

Support NTRW

Become a Patron!
Donate to Never the Right Word and keep us accessible to all. Thank you!

Stay in the Loop

error: Content is protected !!

Pin It on Pinterest